Monday, January 30, 2012

Love/Dislike Relationship with India

There are things that I absolutely love about India and things that make me annoyed, irritated, and disappointed.  Lets start off positive

Things I Love

The food and especially the sweets

The smiles of locals

The bus

Motorbiking through traffic

The natural beauty

The smell of temples inside and the pooja and rituals

Peaceful moments in the city amongst the noise

The farmers with towels on their heads and street vendors  

India's bare feet



Things I do not Like about India
The dirt, filfth, and germs
Corruption and lack of regard for underpriviledged
Everything packaged in supermarkets, convenience stores tastes stale/old due to old expiration dates
Traffic excess
Street dogs
Near impossible to find free wifi
Horrible Customer Service bars/restaurants/country clubs
Have to watch everything you consume to avoid sickness

Efficiency and proactive-not in vocabulary

Overpopulation




Sunday, January 29, 2012

Putting Yourself in Someone Else's Shoes for a Day

What is great about me is the empathy that I have for others. I sit and stare and people, places, things, historical paintings, and I try and feel what their life must be like.  I look at the street vendors and give them credit for their hard work-making samosas, selling corn, cutting flowers, and delivering the paper. How do they make it? Are they tired standing all day? Are they selling enough to make a living? Is their business slow?

At the end of the day, I just want the best for human beings. No matter if you sell street corn or a government official-we are all human beings. We eat, breathe, sleep, and have the same basic needs.  Everyone should be acknowledged as a value to society-an asset to society. Again, this is a lifelong affair with my love for people and making them feel good whether working with them in an NGO or walking down the street.  We are all human beings and acknowledging people’s skills, work, passions, and purpose in important. Actually, I am going to say that it is essential.

My cousin was just saying yesterday she thought it was funny I was taking pictures with the maids.  They are very sweet girls and they deserve to be acknowledged. Her response was that they get paid well so I should not worry about how they are treated. 

Well I wanted to give them some acknowledgement rather than just make requests from them constantly.  They love the attention and they get so happy when being around me. I have to do my part and give love to others-part of living in my purpose.


A Live Indian Waterworks Show

I seriously can not stop crying in India: moments of joy, moments of sadness, and moments of pure beauty.  When we had my Grandmother’s 11 month passing ceremony I cried, when I first arrived at the house of my Grandma-I cried, when my cousin made a beautiful speech I cried, when I saw my family downstairs laughing simply and beautifully-I cried. 
I am identifying that I feel overwhelmed with all this beauty and I joke with people that I hope my heart does not explode in India.  Reuniting with my family is amazing, but I also feel responsible for not being there. Not coming to India to see my Grandmother and Grandfather while they were living makes me feel regret.  Missing the weddings, birthdays, the dinners, and precious moments makes me sad.  But I have to stay positive and focus on the reunification.  It took me 20 years, but I finally made it here. I am sure there will be more waterworks, but it is okay because I am human being and I am allowed to cry, especially when I have missed out on a real family for so long. 

It is Not All About Priscilla

It is refreshing and new to me to have people who care about me.  I have become accustomed to doing whatever I want when I want and not consulting anyone.  This behavior has resulted from developing independence at such a young age, but also involves a lack of regard for others.  I have a tendency to put myself first not thinking about what others thoughts, feelings, or concerns. 
This is another behavior I continue to work on: accountability to others rather than just for myself.  Growing up my mom and I have love and appreciation for one another, but not quite the mother daughter relationship may dream or hope for in life.  And obviously, my father and I had a non-existent relationship therefore  “A  Strong and Independent Priscilla “ developed and off she went into the world. 

When traveling, I just go off for the day and do whatever I want and come back at anytime. This time I am with family who worry and are concerned if they do not hear from me.  I want to get a motor bike and my cousin says he will not allow it.  I see in his face that he worries about me walking into the streets and being alone all day off in the streets of India. If he only knew what his concern means to me.  It is so refreshing to have real family who care about you.  I have been blessed with wonderful friends in Chicago and LA, but this is family.  Family who cares about my well being and staying safe. 

I do not expect to show up and just have everyone cater to me or pull out the royal red carpet for my arrival.  Family is work, dedication, love, and building trust.  I want to be able to prove myself as a person and member of this family.  I showed up after 20 years and in a way I am just a stranger to many, but I want to be a real part of my family and make up for all the time that has been lost. 

Where are you going Madaam?

Let me start off by reminding everyone- I do not like taxis, riksha's, tuk tuks at all. I have bad experiences with them and I do not like giving them my money for lies and frustration. I would much rather take the bus where I am content. 

People who know me know that I have a special sense of direction and most of the time I do not really know where I am going.  As mentioned in previous posts, sometimes this works in my benefit and others it gets annoying and frustrating.

So far in India, it has been annoying and frustrating when it comes to the rikshas.  They always ask, “Where are you going Madam?”, which I really do not understand why they ask this when they do not know where I am going ha! I seem to always be better on foot, bike, or bus, but my family recommends I take the rikshas as the bus is confusing and hard to navigate. 

About 10 percent of the riksha’s I have been on have taken me to my requested destination.  They like to take me on joy rides around town and then say, “Um, what was the address again?” I really cannot emphasize again how much I do not like rikshas, tuk tuks, and cabs! I just want a motor bike to ride around India. It is pretty dangerous, but I know that I can get used to the chaos-I just need practice.

Yesterday I stopped a local on a motorbike, Raj, and asked him to take me to my family’s house.  I could not deal with riksha’s anymore.  Of course he was able to find my family’s home and he said he can take me anywhere in Bangalore on his bike-such a nice person.  He was so polite and shook my hand and wished me a pleasant journey.  I am better off on a local’s bike than in a riksha-really.  I hope my cousin does not read this post ha!

Traffic Madness

When I was riding around in Cambodia on bicycle, I just loved the madness of the traffic. The 5 way intersections with people coming from all directions and riding behind the motor bikes cutting through traffic-exciting.  It was exciting, thrilling, and risk-taking-three things that Pris loves.  Something about this traffic situation just worked. 
Now India seems to be a whole new ballpark.  When I first arrived I just sat and stared at the traffic and people, I could not believe the amount of cars, bikes, rikshas, buses, trucks and non-stop traffic.  It is unbelievable how many cars are on the road and how this hot mess just keeps moving.  Crossing the street is crazy as people just run in the middle as cars just pass by their feet, including myself. It is a whole new way of learning how to cross the street.  Three to five lanes of traffic just combining all into one and I move my head like a bobble head sitting in disbelief with what I am seeing.  It is fascinating how these people get around and how patient one has to be with this traffic.  A destination that is 1 mile away may take in an hour. The traffic is especially bad in Bangalore, where I have been for the past month.  It creates a whole new meaning for the word "traffic."
 But this hot mess manages to work itself out by reaching your destination whether by bus, car, riksha, or on a horse-the Indians will eventually get there!


So This Could be My Life...

Spending time with family consists of eating, drinking, dancing, drinking  tea, more eating, and catching up.  I enjoy our time together and as time goes by I begin to feel a bit closer to them.  Going off to country clubs and family events, I think to myself “So this could be my life.”
I easily could have lived in India and found a job before this point, but backtracking and going into the past is not the way I live so it is best to focus on what could be rather than what could have been.  Finding a full-time job working in India with a NGO is such a real possibility. There is potential to have real time with family: being here for family events-the weddings, the birthdays, the parties, the births, and festivals.

We drive around listening to amazing dance stations heading to the country clubs or nice nightclub venues. It is the life that I have become accustomed to in New York, Chicago, and LA.  This is the reality of my cousin’s life and our family I am realizing-living comfortably and having success in their businesses.  They work hard and play harder, just like me.  If I chose to live in Bangalore, I would fit into this life very well.  Not even a life of materialism, but just sitting at home with everyone in the living room, watching a movie, or making dinner is such a joy. 

For so long, I have felt alone.  I never knew I had such a great family right at my fingertips all this time.  I just want to be there for the family functions and the real time they spend together.  It makes me feel loved and part of something real.  I always encourage my clients to have social support in their lives and I deserve that too.  I deserve to be a part of a real family who love and cares about me.  I have built up such an independence, but overtime I learn it is okay to let people in and let people help you.  Asking for help is something I do not like to do. I like to take care of everything on my own, but what if that is not working for me?

We all need a little bit of help sometimes and swallowing your pride is part of that realization and request PRIS.  I am not talking about anything financial because I can always make it on my own, but I just want love. I want to be unconditionally loved.  It takes two to tango and I definitely need to do my part on this new found family relationship.  I want to be a good cousin, niece, Aunt, and granddaughter.  It takes work, sacrifice, and commitment.  Am I willing to go the extra mile? I hope so.....







The Coffee Cup

Sitting at Café Coffee Day, which is pretty much the Starbucks of India, I am writing and enjoying the beautiful day in Bangalore. I decide to get an iced coffee, which ordering is always a hassle. I want black coffee with ice and milk-no sugar. This is very difficult to communicate without speaking Kannada.  She points at an ice cream shake with whip cream-the complete opposite of what I want. I have been more relaxed just taking in sugar in Malaysia and India, but it has cost me.  Literally, I have gained weight on the scale from all this sugar intake. 
 
After a few minutes with visuals and some Kannada, I think that she has it right-iced coffee with milk.  As I am sitting nearby, I see her playing with a cup putting her hands all inside the cup and all over the outside rim.  Like a hawk, I sit by and watch her continuously put her hands ALL over the cup. I think to myself, she must just be playing with an empty cup. 

Next thing I know, the other girl finishes blending my coffee and goes to pour it inside the cup.  Right before this happens, I shout “No, no, no.” Of course, they look at me and start laughing. 

I say in English and use visual tactics to show them that you can not molest a customer’s cup with your hands.  This was my American moment realizing that I am not in America and they do not care about germs or getting in trouble for doing it.  This is India!

I honestly feel that God really tests me, especially when it comes to germs.  I really failed this test as I shouted rudely, but I had to stop her from putting my coffee inside the molested cup.

Oh india!!!

Defining Ourselves by Career

Often we get the question, “What do you do?” and usually people respond with one response. “ I am a doctor, I am a lawyer, I am a social worker.” As I get older and wiser, I realize I do not want to define myself by one title because I have multiple interests and talents and all of us do on various levels.  These talents, abilities, strengths may be similar or vary greatly. For many, there may be one common denominator and mine is people.  
I love philosophy, history, art, photography, therapy, and education.  All of these are connected between living and breathing and people.  Capturing moments, feeling al ive, and being of service to others, making connections in history, and connecting with peoples real experiences in art and photography. What is your common denominator?

Who said we have to define ourselves in one certain manner? We are human beings with various interests and we should be able to pursue them all. I recently talked with an amazing fellow Chicagoan and she was talking about Dubai and being able to explore your creativity, ideas, and goals.

In Dubai, you can have your ideas come to real life with financing and property given.  In America, many have creative ideas that are stuck in a bubble because “they do not have the money” or they are afraid to break free from the socially constructed 9-5.  It is a shame because people of all races, economic statuses, and cultures have great ideas, but they are not supported by America.  Not just in America, but cultures all over prevent human beings from growth and are not empowering them to grow.  America lets you think outside of the box and explore your dreams, but it does not give you money to do it.  Dubai supports their people,which creates a wonderland of creations.  An underwater hotel, the tallest skyscraper, snow in the dessert? It is letting people take creativity to the highest level. 
Do not let your career consume your being.  You might be blessed to be working a job that is  your passion or it may just be a paycheck. Explore your real interests, passions, strengths, and skills.  Maybe you love hiking/trekking and you think a lot about being a tour guide-then go try it out for a few months.  Your job will not let you take the time off? Then quit or keep the job and work on your passion part time, but your passion deserves your full time attention.  Crunching numbers, financial analysis, IT, and marketing is not going there. It will always be there for you, especially if you have the education and experiences to back it up. 
We have to come up with new,fresh ways to respond to our being.  Any ideas, thoughts? Do you get tired of answering the same question, "What do you do?".  Most people do not ask you after that question, "Are you happy?" "Do you enjoy it?" My belief is that your job response is frequently associated with your identity-who are you are as a person.  This does not have to be the case.  Explore your interests, talents, abilities, and redefine yourself.  Next time you are asked this question-share what you really love and what you are truly passionate about, but if you are living in your passion-awesome- keep living in your purpose!=)




Only In India

You get hit in the head by a large stick from a lady walking with 50 or so 1ft sticks on her head in the middle of a curved road off a cliff

You get off the local city bus in traffic to buy a flash drive and walk a few feet 5 minutes later to get right back on the bus

You go the store to buy $4.00 headphones and the entire process takes 12 minutes

The conductor gets off the bus to buy you a butter dosa during traffic hour

You go into a major department store to buy sunglasses and you ask to see them. “I’m sorry Madam we can not show you them-the man with the key is out sick for the week.”

You go to a tea factory and you see a splatter of puke next to the major tea display

Every other day there is a power outage

A guy jumps in front of your car, gets hit, and just keeps on walking with the driver not even blinking an eye

Purchasing something fresh in a package becomes a luxury

Indian Santas and Indian benzes are roaming the streets through the day and night
You turn a corner driving not sure what you will see, but you continue on looking at your iphone and sipping on a cold coffee
You are stuck on a bus for 5 hours because tigers and elephants are passing through the forests

PRIS Loves Bollywood

Lights, camera, and action! Bollywood is full of life, spirit, being ALIVE, vibrant colors, amazing jewelry, sarris, and hott men. I still can not believe how beautiful the women are-wow! I see them in magazines, TV interviews, and they always look flawless. Their skin and hair is perfection-you go girls! The men are not as beautiful, but there are a few good looking ones.  Some do not even look Indian, which would contribute to my attraction towards them ha!  

I love watching the Bollywood movies, but I especially love the music videos and the songs.  I have about 15 songs that I absolutely love listening to and the beats are very cetchy.  Occassionally, I will walk down the street singing, "Why this, why this, Kuala veri, Kuala veri di", which this song is a common song that everyone knows.  It is about a guy who is heartbroken and angry over a girl.  I purposely walk around singing out loud to make people laugh and for entertainment value.  I love getting a reaction out of people and this definitely does it ha! Where are my camera men to follow me around-seriously?

Here are the top ten songs of 2011 from Times of India. A couple of my favorite songs are Senorita and Dhinga Chica=)


http://idiva.com/video-list-entertainment/the-playlist-top-10-songs-of-2011/10107/4




India- A League of It's Own

India is definitely a game changer, a place of such beauty it really can not be photographed, but has to be experienced.  As my cousin says, “It has the best of the best and the worst of the worst.” Three or four of the top 10 richest people come from India.  It has a world of luxury, but along with it comes millions of underpriviledged and thousands of NGOs. On a daily basis, I  see something that makes my head turn, my eyes widen, my heart beat, and my face smile. Walking around with your eyes wide open, you can see so much sitting on a local bus, walking down a crowded street, or sitting in a temple. Another country can not compare to the immensity of culture and the significant population.
I wonder how millions of people crowding the streets of Bangalore, Delhi, Calcutta, and Mumbai survive and what drives them to their work and passions. There is such beauty in all of this chaos and madness and culture is positively impacted by their religion.  The conservative way that women dress,the religious rituals, the melting pot of languages/tribes/beliefs, and variety of foods.  My Aunt said to treat each state as if it is a different country and I find this to be true as each state has it's own set of cultural values, customs, rituals, and beliefs-not to mention a different language. 
In Karnataka State-the main language is Kannada. In Tamil Nadu, the main language is Tamil. Hindu is a language that goes across cultures and states and therefore I find it important to start learning Hindi. Learning 5 words a day of Kannada stopped once I left Bangalore so now it is time to learn Hindi=)



Hold onto Your Inner Child

“I don’t want to grow up I’m a toys r’us kid.” Those growing up in the United States have definitely heard this song a few times growing up.  I always loved that childhood song and I find today it still rings true to my heart and inner spirit.  As we get older, we focus on security, stability, and being responsible.  While it is normal for our needs, wants, and desires to shift with age-it is okay to hold on to characteristics that rejuvenate us and make us feel young.  That is why I believe in holding on to your inner child and letting yourself fully explore, enjoy, and just be. 

I am able to connect well with children because I can see through their eyes with the feeling of curiosity, excitement, wonder, interest, and adventure. When traveling I love to constantly explore new little, hidden treasures whether it is alleys to markets, forbidden path on a hiking trail, a museum, a park, a new food, a new neighborhood, ice cream, heights, and uplifting music.  I get so fascinated and interested sometimes that I have difficulty staying with a group or friends when traveling.  I am staring at a food, talking to a street vendor, looking at a craft-perhaps too much exploring.  With everything comes balanace and if there is imbalance-develop insight into your behavior and what is creating this imbalance.   I recognize that it is good to have balance so I can improve my plan making ability and timeliness when abroad.  But I definitely am appreciative that my higher power gave me my senses to  BE ALIVE and enjoy the beauty of people, nature, and manmade structures.  Let yourself be a kid when you are traveling and enjoy life’s treasures!

Haunted by What Could Have Been

My Grandmother’s pictures haunt me. I stare in her eyes and God’s spirit runs through me as I feel her love for me.  She was one of a kind and strong, courageous just like me.  She was a beautiful spirit from above and I missed the opportunities to be with her.  Why did I miss out on so much? I feel cheated by real love and what could have been.  I wonder why I was forced into such loneliness and independence when I had family that seemed distant yet were so close.  One would say I had my mother’s side of the family, but they were never really family as it always felt superficial. I was given this path from my higher power and with this path I have learned, lived, loved, sacrificed, and worked to be of service to others. But I am still haunted......

Haunted by her face, her smile, and her scent

Haunted by my own irresponsibility and lack of regard

Haunted by our once meeting yet leaving me so soon

Haunted by fear and regret for my own choices

Haunted by a love that could have blossomed, a relationship that could have been

Haunted by my father’s heart beating for his mother

Haunted by a love from above that touches my soul so deep I cry and cry

Haunted by not saying goodbye and barely even saying hello

PRIS

What Goes Around Comes Around

When your life’s purpose is to give yourself to others, you work with people because your heart is fullfilled.   One should not expect things in return at any point and time and rewards and success is natural.  Material gain is not a component of your life's work and if anything it is just an accessory to your purpose.  If one is working just for the material gain and does not enjoy their work, I hope for one to one day move closer to their purpose.  
Lately with the people that have been brought into my life.  I can't help but wonder where all these amazing people are coming from and why I deserve their wonderful hospitality and human goodness.  These people are genuine, hospitable, helpful people that go out of their way for ME.  Often, I sit and ponder their being.  How are their souls so pure and selfless? I give back to others through my work, but I am not nearly as giving and selfless with family and friends. 
And perhaps this is due to the fact I grew up in America.  Where are these selfless people in the USA?How did we become so lost and self absorbed especially in the areas I lived in LA, Orange County, and New York? 

Many of these beautiful people I encounter are sent from my higher power.  These experiences, interactions, smiles, mannerisms, and verbalizing/addressing concerns tune me into his spirit and thankful for my connection with these people.
In time, I realize that it is okay to ask for help.  I actually feel bad when people go out of their way for me, especially strangers or people I am just meeting.  Since a young age, I have been afraid to ask for “help”.  I am strong, independent, and can do it alone.  This is shifting in a beautiful way as human beings all need help at one point or another and it is okay to ask for it.  In my case it is okay to not ask for help and be given help as well.  I am realizing that God is giving me support/help/love through people.  He is showing me a world of beauty with his presence. He is reminding me that I am not alone.  He is showing me that what goes around comes back around... 
Thank you to meeting such wonderful people and thank you to my higher power!


Going Vegetarian

Traveling around Asia, I saw many animals, pigs, ox, horses, goats, roosters, and chickens.  They look so happy and content with their life, which I am sure they are until their death.  The thought of them roaming around with happy little lives and then they are butchered for our own human satisfaction.  It just does not seem fair to me and it never really has overtime.

Growing up in a primarily white suburb of Chicago, I did not eat many different types of meat.  The food was very basic and bland consisting of a beef burger, grilled chicken breast, turkey, and occasional pork chops. In our area, it always cost more for the white meat and my mom always spent that extra money, which made us become accustom to just eating a lot of chicken and turkey meat. 


This all sums up to the fact that meat was never really a necessity growing up and it is not now.  I usually ate it for protein and diet purposes eating low carb and higher protein, which is effective in small meals and not excess quantities.  Overtime, I learned that I loved seafood and there is plenty of protein in vegetables, beans, and fish! So why not become a Pescatarian-fish, eggs, beans, and vegetables. 
I am not willing to give up seafood and it just is not the same as meat. Many can argue that fish are also living, breathing organisms, which is true. But it just is not the same as eating an animal for me.  I was especially touched by my friends I met that were animals, Mr. Humphreys, the pig.  How could I eat Mr. Humphrey’s?


Walking through all the markets and seeing and smelling the meats really did it for me too.  All of the different parts of meats that SE Asians eat just totally disgusted me.   In many cities, I just enjoyed the vegetarian dishes and pretty much just stuck with seafood and some chicken.  I loved the vegetarian dishes way more than the non-veg dishes so why eat meat? Here goes my pescatarian kick=)

My Cousin's Indian Wedding and Priscilla's Potential Wedding

Starting off the day was not so great as there were a bunch of my family members getting ready and I was the last one to get my sarri draped on.  My room is downstairs and everyone was getting ready upstairs so this is my fault as I should have got my butt upstairs. Also, the maids were hogging the bathroom and I had to wait until they were finished to take a shower.  All the doors were locked up at 9am and locked upstairs were my shoes I had just bought for the wedding.  Therefore, I had to wear flat, black sandals to the wedding.  Anyone who knows me knows that this is not acceptable for me AT ALL. 
Everyone had left so I drove with my cousin's to the palace grounds. I was not a happy camper and  this was visually showing on my face. Upon our arrival, I immediately wanted to go to the bathroom to fix my sarri.  It was draped very quickly and it did not look right.  My nice friend, Angalina, fixed my saari for me and my little niece gave me a flower to put in my hair.  I decided to stop pouting like a ten year old and enjoy my cousin's wedding.  Afterall, this was his day not mine.  
There were two different ceremonies because the bride is from a tribe in South Coorg.  Both had various rituals involving fire, coconut, flowers, and the immediate family by their side the whole time.   Every indian custom and tradition has either a scientific, logical, historical, or spiritual significance

Here are a few explanations for rituals from my book "Why do we...", which describes the rituals in Indian culture from the homes to family functions to weddings and funerals. 

Why do we offer the coconut?
It is offered in a sacrificial fire while performing  homa.  The coconut is broken and placed before the lord.  It is offered to please the lord's desires. 

Why do we apply the holy ash?
Bhasma(ash from the holy sacrificial fire where special wood along with ghee and other herbs is offered as worship of the lord.  Or the deity is worshipped by pouring ash(ahhisheka) and then distributing bhasma.  Bhasma means that "sins are destroyed and the Lord is remembered-destruction of evil and worship of the divine.

Why do we say shaanti twice?
Peace is a natural state of being.  The idea is to acheive peace without reaching aggravations and loss of focus. 

Enjoyed myself at both the ceremony and the reception. Food was excellent, met many new relatives, and enjoyed spending time with my cousin's friends. I was mingling around talking to everyone as usual, but did not find any candidates for my own wedding. My family mentioned that once I find a man I should have an Indian wedding. After taking part in all the rituals, ceremonies, and the reception- I definitely want an Indian wedding.  Wedding is not currently in my vocabulary, but if I do get married I want it to be a 7 day Indian affair ha!







family photo=)

The Reception



















Thursday, January 26, 2012

Delays In Posts

I apologize to everyone for my delays in posting.  I had a combination of limited internet connection and a computer crisis.  All of my writing is piling up on Microsoft word and I have to transfer it over and everyday my mind is writing more and more so it is hard to keep up.  Stay tuned for a bunch of posts coming!  Thank you to my followers!

LOVE
PRIS

Sunday, January 15, 2012

New Years Day 2012

"The starting of a brand new day..."

New Years Day I woke up and decided it was time to get moving and start the New Year off right so that meant it was time to run! Now keep in mind from my other posts about movement in Asia-it is pretty much non-existent. Whenever I run people look at me like I am crazy, which I gain even more entertainment from ha! So I knew running in Bangalore would be quite an adventure. 

I left my cousin’s house with no sense of direction just with my running shoes,my sunglasses and my surgical mask to prevent inhaling the fumes. I had many looks from men and I turned those looks into smiles as I waived and shouted, “Happy New Year.” I saw men peeing in the street, cows roaming the streets, street vendors with many local delicacies, women cutting fresh flowers, locals leaving from temple, cooking inside of homes, dogs roaming the streets, kids running and splashing through puddles of dirty water, and so many men standing in front of shops and on the streets socializing.  Kids were playing baseball in dirt fields, coconuts on every corner, huge papayas and watermelons, and just the beauty of people trading. 

As I ran down the narrow streets, up and down hills with riksha’s and cars beeping non-stop I felt ALIVE. These streets make you feel alive and this city makes me feel ALIVE and I love it. I smiled and said hello to so many people and again they have such hope and beauty in their eyes when I acknowledge them and wish them well. My heart is very connected to my people and finally we are united. This is a life long love affair with my Indian people-don’t worry I won’t let you down and I will try my best to stay connected with you and acknowledge your being.  The sunset coming down on the busy city was a nice end to the day.  I managed to stay out til darkness as I was exploring the shopping centers and dropping in the markets and local stores. 

We spend January 1 walking through our lives, room by room, drawing up a list of work to be done, cracks to be patched. Maybe this year, to balance the list, we ought to walk through the rooms of our lives... not looking for flaws, but for potential. ~Ellen Goodman

Saturday, January 14, 2012

NYE 2012

Spending New Years with family after years and years of being with friends was such a nice experience. I have to admit I did miss my champagne and Dick Clark's countdown, but it is meaningless next to the importance of family.  We arrived at my cousin Ashwin's place around 10pm and everyone had pretty much arrived. My aunts, uncles, cousins, and my Uncle BabaKrishna who I never formally met. He greeted me with such open arms and with his warmth and love, I can see where he gets the title "No Problem" Uncle. He says I can come and stay whenever I would like and he would love the company. He keeps saying, "God Bless me " and he says he loves me and will pray for happiness for my mother, brother, and myself. He did not realize I was his brother in law's daughter, and that realization made him thankful to finally meet me. He told me how much he misses my Uncle Raj who passed away and my father-especially the relationship between the three of them. He is so kind he makes my heart melt and makes me feel loved and cared about.

We munch on chicken lollipops, dumplings, potatoes, and snacks while drinking homemade Rose wine by my Aunt. The girls sit around catching up while the kids are running around on Pepsi highs. My Aunt Indira shows me some of her saris as I am planning on wearing two for the wedding. Peach for day and a sparkly pink for night are my picks. It is so nice sitting and spending time with everyone. Simple and very nice.
                                                             


As the clock hits 11:45, I get super excited and start to verbalize my own countdown off my cousin's iPhone. My cousin, Adi, prepares shots of abstinenth for everyone-I mean everyone. I did not want to drink it, but everyone else did so I did for my family and the holiday-no enjoyment from it at all.
I continued to go around the kitchen and table saying the time trying to spread some excitement and entertainment ha!
12:00 midnight hits and we all greet each other Happy New Year! It is so nice going around and giving everyone real hugs of joy and happiness. We take some group photos and I continue to sip on some wine.  My cousin brings out the Chicken biryani, tandoori chicken, pasta salad, and black forest cake.

I went outside with the boys and was chatting with my Uncles and cousins while listening to music playing from the car(oh my cousin Adi). My Uncle Raj makes a toast to Adi saying he is just as wonderful as his father. My Uncle begins to tell some stories in Kannada about his father and Aru begins to tear and so do I. I tell my Aunt that I wish I could have met him as everyone says he was the most wonderful human being. It upsets me that I was not there to see him before he passed, but I take personal responsibility for this, just like my Grandma passing. I should have been there.. My Uncle tells me about my Grandma passing and how he went to yoga class and at the end got a phone call that she passed away. The tears in his eyes made mine tear up and I just wish I could have been there as it would have brought such joy to her.
As I go back inside, I realize a few of my Aunt's are being extra friendly and they were buzzed ha! It was so cute. My Aunt Indira was mixing beer with wine and shots-oh boy!
We all continue to drink and eat, the kids fall asleep, and it is basically me, my Aunt, and the boys. Adi, Satch, and myself decide to take off. Satch and I fall asleep in the car and I wake up to Adi telling us we are making another stop for a few minutes. I was not sure where we were going, but it ended up being to see his friends. I jump on the couple I love and wish them a Happy New Year. My cousin has wonderful friends because he is wonderful too. It was a nice wrap up to the night and way past my bed time so we called it a night=)
Oh I forgot to add the theme was Bollywood bright colors sand mismatch.

Indian Wedding Part 1

Many American weddings have that one special day that you have worked towards for months and months.  In India, this is quite different with many Indian weddings having a 3-5 day wedding period.   In India, most children live with their parents until marriage so the groom has his family perform the rituals in his home and the bride in her own home.  The homes are fully decorated with lights and flowers so everyone knows someone is getting married.   At our home of the groom, there were various poojas performed that have different meanings.  With it being my second day in India, after quite an emotional first day, I was just observing what was happening asking a few questions here and there.   
     
All of the immediate family were performing the rituals and each person performed an individual blessing for him consisting of rubbing tumeric oil all over his body until he glowed bright orange. This was performed as a blessing, but my Aunt also said it is done to make him glow on his wedding day.
After this we had a big lunch and then had our mindy done, which the designer makes an individual design for each person. After this the bollywood music came on and we all started dancing. It was a beautiful moment and I was so happy to be reunited with my family
               

                                                            The house decorations
My adorable nieces






The groom before....

Middle

After






My Beautiful Cousins
The groom and Priscilla




Love these two!
My Nephew the cutest thing ever!